Tag Archives: God

The Baby is Coming!

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In one week, my wife will be having another baby. Yes, we do know whether the baby is a boy or girl. But we are not telling anyone until the day of the baby’s arrival. My wife wants there to be at least one surprise on this important day.

The journey of pregnancy is about ready to end. In less than seven days, our doctor will perform a C-section on my wife so that we can welcome our final child into this world. The journey began this spring when my wife found out that she was pregnant. If you have been following our journey, you remember that we were not sure if this baby was going to survive. You have probably prayed for us. Thank you.

Even though this journey of “being pregnant” is about ready to end, a new journey of taking care of a newborn is about ready to start. This is exciting and exhausting to think about at the same time. But I am not going to focus on the future in this article. I will let the future take care of itself. I will trust that God is in control.

My focus in this article is the last ten years of our life.

In 2004, we had our first child.

In 2006, we lost our second child.

In 2007, my wife had an unviable ectopic baby.

In 2008, we had a baby who almost died and needed to stay two weeks in the NICU.

In 2010, my wife had another unviable ectopic baby.

In 2011, we had a healthy baby…but mom almost died.

In 2014, we are having another child.

People keep asking me if we are done having children. And my answer has been: “We better be done!” This chapter of my life is about to close, and I am ready. We all go through different chapters in our life. Some chapters are longer than others and some of them are filled with more joy than others. Here are a few things I learned along the way in this ten year chapter of my life.

It didn’t go the way I thought it would. When we started having children in 2004, I thought we would have a few healthy children and then eventually decide to stop on our own terms. We didn’t know that we were going to become the poster child for “what can go wrong in the pregnancy, will go wrong.” I had a plan. We were not going to get pregnant until after the first four years of our marriage. That went according to plan. And I also wanted to be finished having children by my early thirties. You could say that I missed my goal by a few years. Even though nothing went according to plan for these ten years, it was still worth it. God still gave us a family. And we are grateful. Here is something that should comfort us all when things don’t go the way we think they should: “God was never surprised by any of the events and He was in total control…and ultimately, God knows what the best plan is for you family.” So, hold onto your plans lightly, because if God has different plans, prepare yourself for a difficult, but rewarding journey.

Children are a gift, not a burden to raise. When you lose a child to death, or when you try month after month to get pregnant, but it is unsuccessful, it gives you a profound appreciation for the little one(s) that you do have with you. When we had “just Lily” for the first four years of our parenthood, we learned what a gift she was to us because we weren’t sure if we would have any more children. The trials I have had to go through in these ten years have given me a desire to show my children how much they are loved. They can count on their daddy hugging and kissing them several times a day. Just yesterday I was visiting with another dad at his house. Two of his children were trying to get his attention, but he kept telling them, “Go and play, I’m busy.” This dad has four children. When I have been around him before, I get the indication that he would rather not be bothered by his kids. That makes me sad. I wonder why some families even have kids if they spend little time with them. What’s the point of having kids if you don’t want to hang out with them? Soon enough, those little four year olds will turn into fourteen year olds and will not need your attention like they do now. In fact, the tables will turn and you will try to get their attention, but they might tell you to go off and play because they are now too busy for you.

Stories give evidence of God’s goodness in our lives. Maybe it is just my kids (I doubt it), but they love stories. Every single night before they go to bed, they beg for me to tell them a story. Most nights I tell them at least one story. Just last night, I told them each a story about them when they were younger, and they loved it. That is the power of being a parent. When we can reach back into our memories and bless our children with a past event from his or her life, it teaches them a few things about themselves. It teaches them that they are maturing and don’t do some of the silly things they did in the past. But it also lets them know that we, as a parent, were there for them when they were younger. We remember. We cared. We changed that “awful diaper.” We wiped up the vomit. We drove them to the ER when they broke their arm. We have a picture of the first fish they caught. We held them upright all night when they had the “croup.” We are mom. We are dad. And we have stories of God’s goodness to us in the trials and triumphs of life.

Being “okay” with the chapter ending. In my heart, I know that this should be our last child. But I will miss the excitement of having babies and getting to see little ones grow both physically and spiritually. I was talking with a man the other day whose wife had her final child when he was 46 years old. And what he told me shocked me: “Jeremy, I wasn’t done yet. I wanted to keep going, but my wife had to stop because of a procedure.” It is really hard for some people to end a chapter, but I believe God gives us the peace when it is time. Amazingly, God didn’t give us a peace after our most recent baby was born in 2011. I always wondered why. But now, I know why. He wanted us to have one more. Just remember, in order to experience the joys of a new chapter in life, the previous chapter must end first. Be willing to shut that chapter if God is gently calling you to. Listen to His voice. His voice is calm and yet there is peace associated with His voice.

Let me give you one last thought. Amy and I have to admit, that as December 17 gets a little closer, we have a few fears that well up within us. Look at our past story. Search the last ten years of our lives and I think you would agree that we have reason to be apprehensive. But we trust in God. And we appreciate your prayers.

 

Should Christians Carry a Gun

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One of the most controversial subjects over the last few years has been “gun control” and whether or not the government should regulate the use of weapons in the United States of America. There are good people on both sides of this argument. This is a complicated issue because there are various types of weapons. There are also two extremes that we must avoid; yet sadly, too many people place themselves within one of these groups:

Extreme Group #1: All guns should be banned…just let the police and military protect us.

Extreme Group #2: Every kind of gun and weapon should be legal to use.

With this in mind, let us look for the truth in this complex issue. In this article, we will first look at what the founding fathers have to say about “gun control” and then we will take a look at what the Bible has to say about “defending” yourself. Also, let me state that this is not a comprehensive study. All your questions will probably not be answered.

Those who argue for the right to “bear arms” often say something like: “It’s my second amendment right to carry a weapon!” What does the second amendment actually state?

“A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”

Over the last two hundred years, most United States’ citizens have interpreted this amendment in a straight-forward way. Most citizens believe that this amendment ensures that one can defend themselves against any kind of illegal force that comes against them, whether that is from a neighbor, an outsider, or even from your own government.

Richard Henry Lee (1732–1794) was one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence. He helped frame the second amendment in the First Congress. This is what Mr. Lee wrote:

“… to preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them…”

Yes, life was very different back then. Most people had guns. Hunting was more of a necessity back then. And there wasn’t a developed police force to protect people. Yet, part of the freedom the signers of the Declaration of Independence were envisioning was the ability for every free person in this country to be able to protect himself or herself from evil. This should always be our vision as a country. We have gotten to the point where we want everyone else to protect us. But that is not always possible. If we truly live in a free country, we must give people the right to “bear arms” to protect themselves. Therefore, it appears that our founding fathers saw freedom as the ability to protect yourself from evil.

Does the Bible say anything about the right to bear arms? Obviously, the Bible does not specifically address the issue of gun control, since firearms like we use today were not manufactured in ancient times. But accounts of warfare and the use of weaponry, such as swords, spears, bows and arrows, darts and slings were well-documented in the pages of the Bible. I’d like to make four statements based on biblical truth.

Statement #1: A weapon can be used for good or evil.

You have probably heard the statement: “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” Guns are not the issue here. The heart of mankind is the issue. When someone is determined to murder someone else, he or she will use whatever weapon is available to succeed in the evil plan. For example, the Bible doesn’t tell us what kind of weapon the first murderer, Cain, used to kill his brother Abel in Genesis 4. Cain could have used a stone, a club, a sword, or perhaps even his bare hands. A weapon was not mentioned in the account.

Weapons in the hands of law-abiding, peace-loving citizens can be used for good purposes such as hunting, recreational and competitive sports, and keeping peace. Beyond self-defense, a person properly trained and prepared to use a firearm can actually deter crime, employing the weapon to protect innocent lives and prevent violent offenders from succeeding in their crimes.

Statement #2: The Israelites were expected to have their own personal weapons.

Every man would be summoned to arms when the nation confronted an enemy. They didn’t send in the Marines. The people defended themselves. Each man had a sword in this passage:

David said to his men, “Each of you strap on your sword!” So they did, and David strapped his on as well. About four hundred men went up with David, while two hundred stayed with the supplies” (1 Samuel 25:13).

Could you ever envision the United States in such turmoil that citizens need to be able to protect themselves from terrorists who infiltrate the country? “No way, that would never happen,” you might say. But just look at other countries. It is happening. Go to the movie theater. It seems that countless movies are based on this premise. And look to the news. It is happening on a small scale in our country. What makes any of us think that things are going to get better before they get worse?

Statement #3: Weapons were used in the Bible for the purpose of self-defense.

Weapons were never forbidden. In fact, we see clear commands in the Bible for people to defend themselves when someone is trying to attack them.

If a thief is caught breaking in at night and is struck a fatal blow, the defender is not guilty of bloodshed (Exodus 22:2).

From that day on, half of my men did the work, while the other half were equipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. The officers posted themselves behind all the people of Judah who were building the wall. Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other, and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked (Nehemiah 4:16-18).

Jesus is well-known for his statement about teaching his followers to turn the other cheek when an enemy strikes them. When I was younger, I remember listening to a kind-hearted Christian husband stand up in church and state that if an intruder broke into his house and started to assault his family, he would try to turn the other cheek and allow the intruder to do what he wanted because this is what Jesus taught. Even at a young age, I knew this wasn’t truth. My heart burned with anger at this man’s poor interpretation of the biblical text. Whenever we interpret the Bible, we must take the entire context of the Bible into account. What else did Jesus have to say about weapons and self-defense?

I believe that the “turn the other cheek” principle applies to individuals. If someone wants to harm me, I will try to get away from them, but I will try my best not to harm them. On the other hand, if they are trying to harm my wife, children, or someone else, I will definitely step in and try my best to protect them. And I think Jesus teaches this principle.

Jesus appears to promote the use of weapons for self-defense in a statement he makes right before he is executed. While giving his farewell discourse to the disciples before going to the cross, he instructed the apostles to purchase side arms to carry for self-protection. He was preparing them for the extreme opposition and persecution they would face in future missions:

He said to them, “But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one. It is written: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors’; and I tell you that this must be fulfilled in me. Yes, what is written about me is reaching its fulfillment.” The disciples said, “See, Lord, here are two swords.” “That’s enough!” he replied (Luke 22:36-38).

It appears that Jesus is preparing his followers for a revolution. But when Jesus is later arrested by the Roman soldiers, Jesus lives out his “turn the other cheek” philosophy. As soldiers seized Jesus, Jesus warned Peter to put away his sword:

“For all who take the sword will perish by the sword” (Matthew 26:52).

Some scholars believe this statement was a call to Christian pacifism, while others understand it simply to mean in a general sense that “violence breeds more violence.” Jesus told Peter to “put your sword back in its place.” The phrase “back in its place” is important here. That “place” would be at Peter’s side. Jesus didn’t say, “Throw it away.” After all, he had just ordered the disciples to arm themselves. The reason was obvious: to protect the lives of the disciples, not the life of the Son of God. Jesus was saying something like this: “Peter, this is not the right time for a fight.”

Here is something interesting: Peter openly carried his sword, a weapon similar to the type Roman soldiers employed at the time. Jesus knew Peter was carrying a sword. He allowed this, but forbid him to use it aggressively. Most importantly, Jesus did not want Peter to resist the inevitable will of God the Father, which our Savior knew would be fulfilled by his arrest and eventual death on the cross. Scripture is quite clear that Christians are called to be peacemakers (Matthew 5:9), and to turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:38-40). Thus, any aggressive or offensive violence was not the purpose for which Jesus had instructed them to carry a weapon just hours earlier. This leads me to the last statement.

Statement #4: To allow evil to happen and not do anything about it is morally wrong.

According to the Old Testament Law for the Jews, if a thief is caught breaking in and is killed by the homeowner, the defender is not guilty of bloodshed (Exodus 22:2). But…

If it happens after sunrise, the defender is guilty of bloodshed. Anyone who steals must certainly make restitution, but if they have nothing, they must be sold to pay for their theft (Exodus 22:3).

In this passage God stated that it’s okay to protect yourself and your family. In the dark, it is impossible to see and know for certain what someone is up to; whether an intruder has come to steal, inflict harm, or to kill, is unknown at the time. In the daylight, faces can be seen, weapons can be seen. We can see if a thief has come just to swipe a loaf of bread through an open window, or if an intruder has come with more violent intentions.

To permit a murder when one could have prevented it is morally wrong.

To allow a rape when one could have hindered it is an evil.

To watch an act of cruelty to children without trying to intervene is morally inexcusable.

Not resisting evil is an evil of omission, and an evil of omission can be just as evil as an evil of commission. Ultimately, the decision to bear arms is a personal choice determined by one’s own convictions. As a believer, the use of deadly force would be applied only as a last resort, when no other option is available, to prevent an evil from being committed and to protect human life.

Here are three questions to ask yourself as you ponder this issue:

  1. If I am placed in a situation where I might need to “pull the trigger,” have I thought through the domino effect of killing another person? The legal battle? The family of the deceased and their reaction? Being convicted of murder and losing my own freedom? The idea of sending someone to eternity when they are most likely not saved?
  2. Are some weapons (and accessories) just completely unnecessary for the common citizen, or should all weapons be available to us?
  3. Even though the disciples (Peter, James, John, etc.) all had swords to defend themselves, none of them did, even when they were persecuted and ultimately were martyred by evil authorities. What does that teach us about our high calling of being a peace maker as an individual?